MadelineAwesome

if i ever go missing will you please proofread my missing persons ad?

LOOK CLOSER.

next time some you know goes missing, spell the entire thing wright/write/right/correctly.

BUT COME ON. MISSING PERSONS ARE NO LAUGHING PUNCTUATION MATTER. i am not entirely douchey. i am helping to find her via posting this on my blog. freals. if you see this girl with wrighting all over herself plz contact the popo.

(i wrote this yesterday but i can’t just make 2 really great posts in one day. gotta spread the love over time dawg. OMG I ALMOST SAID YALL I AM CARLES)

You all know that i “suffer” from Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy, or rather IT suffers from ME (ZING!). and basically i was sitting in physics (KINDA  LEARNING PHYSICS DONT WORRY MOMDAD). And i was researching my own medical ailments becuase I am a narcissist and Wiki was like “japanese people are totally into getting HCM” So i think that means by way of some math property that I am japanese. I think other clues that might lead to this conclusion are that I take japanese. i have been to japan. i would like to go back to japan. and i’m into raw fish/eel.

But there are some reasons why i could not be japanese: 1. i’m white. 2. I am best friends with a Korean and we ALL know that is impossible.

Cats also get HCM. So i am probably just a japanese cat. meow.

On an unrelated, but really TOTALLY related note because i am in physics class, i wish that i had a camera or something right now because a bunch of funny things have happened in here already. We have a subsitute (WTF COLLEGE. i thought we just got days off. NO SUBZ FOR KAHLEJ PLZ) and he is doing all sorts of crazy things like making us do the wave and making kids come down to the front and play slinky games with him. Sry. No pix. You will have to use your dragon tales rhyme to use your imagination. Plz also imagine baby bop in this imagination deal. k?

So basically I like to read hipster runoff multiple times a day. So do my friends. We laugh and joke about it. We talk about it during long walks on the beach…(NO BEACHES  IN SOUTHERN INDIANA SRY.) But i hadn’t read it in a few days so i was reading the back entries just now (post math, pre physics, srry FIZZX) and HRO just defined my entire life. lets be real here. I’m just trying to be really alt in college so blah blah blah here is what Carles had to say about the Alt-est major in college.

Carles lists:
1) Miscellaneous Associate’s Degree
2) Photoshop
3) Art History with a focus on the post-Photoshop era
4) Architecture
5) Teaching for America
6) Philosophy with a concentration on Graphic Design Ideology
7) Music Business with a minor in BlogCommunications
Alternative Economics
9) Graphic Design (at a school without computers)
10) Sociology + Psychology
11) Marketing
12) Communications
13) A major about music where you spend a year using the campus’ recording facilities to ‘make ur own album’
14) Film with a concentration in French No Wave cinema
15) Film Studies before 1900
16) Mashup Engineering (or whatever Girl Talk majored in)

WTF GET OUT OF MY BRAIN MAN!!!!!!

I imed Carles a few days ago and we are going to go on a date when he comes to chicago or indiana or something. I will blog about it. He might blog about it. It is going to be so alt. Maybe i will interview him on my radioshow….

here is a link to HRO in case Carles thinkgs that me quoting him without a link is a worthy cause to end our e-lationship.

My buddy Sam. He is taking a class where there is a new cult person in his class every week. HOW LONG TIL COLLEGE STARTS BEING LIKE THAT? i mean i like it and stuff, but i’m sitting here trying to figure out how many different ways i can pick like 3 felt tip pens, 6 ballpoint pens and 4 pencils from a cup or something. NOT WORTH MY TIME.

NO MATH. JUST KULTZ. NOT KLUTZ THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE FRIENSHIP BRACELET BOOKS.

NOT THESE GUYS EITHER:

STRAIGHT UP CULTZ. i just want to know ALL about them.

these guys:

this doesn’t really have to do with a cult i dont think but i found it on google and check it out if you are not scared of anything. CLICK ME DAWG.

I made some half-ass songs. i kinda like them. some people like them. maybe you will. wanna hear? wanna be my myspace friend?

http://www.myspace.com/madelineandthebigcatfamily

i never thought i’d be the nast college student. but here i am–nasty.

I NEED TO DO MY DISHES. THIS IS WHY:

Dream catchers do not work. I had a dream a few nights ago about being outside some shady back of the woods, perhaps creole themed restaurant with my parents. I was sitting on the ground and some gopher/meercat lookin azz animal pops up and comes walking (maybe on its hind legs) towards me. Parents and I are like “aww how cute look at this little animal.” BUT THEN IT CHOMPS IT EFFING TEEF INTO MY KNEE. IT KEEPS CHOMPING AND CHOMPING. And its weird. it doesn’t hit bone or anything and its almost as if my knee is made of like meatloaf or something. Maybe some dense ass meatloaf but I’m just trying to give you an accurate description of the consistency of my knee in my dream. My parents are like LOLing at this and I’m like SCREAMING bloody murder. My goddamn knee looked like that marshmallow salad people bring to potluck dinners but never make for themselves. you know. i guess they usually do it with green jello but this was like flesh and blood colored marshmallow salad. HERE. THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE ON MY KNEE BUT SLIGHTLY LESS PINK and more SLATHERED in BLOOD.

eventually my dad gets up and just sort of grabs this bitch animal and pulls his long teeth out of my meatloaf knee like he was freeing Excalibur from the rock or whatever that was all about.

As you may have seen in previous posts or no facebook or something, i have two dream catchers. Aren’t they supposed to keep bad dreams away? Are they cancelling each other out? Does it work like that? Are these dream catchers operating as sin waves?
LUEZERS: